We moved this past summer to a new community in Missouri, almost 2 hours away from our past hometown where we had lived for 19 years. Our second child, has been invited back for good friends’ birthday parties, sleepovers during Christmas break, and other sundry events. During her last visit a week ago, one of her friend’s was regaling their group with a story that had happened at a recent high school assembly. The school official was informing the student body about new rules for the upcoming Junior -Senior Prom, rules that hadn’t been used before, at this high school. The students were informed that Seniors who had a 94% attendance rate would be allowed to attend the prom for free, that purchasing a ticket would be waived. As this new rule sunk in to the students’ brains, one girl stood up and asked a question of the school official. She informed the official and student body that since she had been out of school for 4 months because she had had a baby, …”What Y’All Gonna Do for Me?” was her concern and question. The school official didn’t know how to answer this, himhawed around and finally told her she would need to ask her guidance counselor about it.
My daughter and her friends reacted with laughter and states of shock and/or surprise at the nerve of this girl. I have been mulling this anecdote over in my mind and decided to put myself in the school official’s shoes and here is the answer that I would have given this girl. First of all young woman, you are now a mother, not just a teen who wants to go to her Prom. For whatever reasons, you decided to have sex with a male during the second semester of your Junior year. The result is that now you have a child to care for, raise, love, and teach responsibility to. Your first concern should be that of your child, not if you have to pay money to go to a school dance. If you were my daughter, I would say that you have to stay home that night and be a mom to your child. If you can be responsible and find a decent baby sitter, than perhaps you can go to the prom, but who will pay for the dress? You will also have to pay the baby sitter, pay for shoes, accessories, possibly pay for your meal afterwards, and then be home by 11, as most baby sitters don’t want to stay at someone’s house all night watching a child. Paying for the ticket will also be your responsibility. Being absent for 4 months to have your baby and then miss school due to postpartum recovery doesn’t add up to a 94% attendance rate, so no free ticket for you!
This student’s attitude really bothers me. How many generations of Americans have this same attitude, that if I mess up, someone still owes me something. Who cares if I have consequences to face, chances are I’ll do my best to ignore them and demand someone give me something for the troubles that I’ve brought down upon myself. No shame, no responsibility, this attitude only promises a society with an ever downward spiral to moral ambiguity and anarchy. God help this innocent child this selfish teen is raising so he or she won’t turn out like this mother!